Herewith quotes from Youth Camp in Denmark 2007. Yes,
I was too busy attempting to enjoy myself to actually record many quotes, so
these are mostly from memory, or quotes I collected on the journeys there and
back (breakfast in
Pooka: “Should I go and get it? [pause]
I’ll go and get it, shall I?”
Ros: “I’m quite proud; I got everyone apart from Jessie
on the train. That’s good.”
Ruth: “Fuck it. I’m going to
Becca: “My phone doesn’t actually like travelling.”
Laurie: “So it’s an anti-travel phone?”
Becca: […] “It doesn’t really like sound either, so if you
talk on the phone, or it goes near any loud sounds, it goes into perpetual
blackness…”
Anna: “Maybe you should think of getting a new model.”
Laurie: “I was at
Laurie: “I’m just looking at this here…”
Hannah: “Well, that clarifies things.”
Laurie: [reading from the “Guardian”] “
Hannah: “Yesssssss!”
Laurie: “We’ve been moving down the valley for ages.”
Becca: “That’s because you’re a loser.”
Laurie: “I think
you’re being a bit silly.”
Becca: “I think your face is a bit silly.”
Becca: “I want to say ‘your face’, but I really need to
stop saying that.”
Laurie: “Your mum.”
Becca: “Your mum’s face.”
I.O.U.
INFINITY POUNDS
[Hannah strokes Becca’s
hair.]
Becca: “Hannah’s bullying me!”
Hannah: “I like your hair!”
Pooka: “Hannah… Hannah, stop it, or I’ll send you to the
time-out chair.”
Laurie: “What time-out chair?...
Oh, there’s Jessie’s chair.”
Hannah: “How do you keep it un-frizzy?”
Becca: “You don’t sit next to Hannah!”
Ros: “Are we still under the sea?”
Pooka: “No, there hasn’t been any calypso yet.”
Ros: “So what happens if we get to
Pooka: “Then we ALL DIE!”
[Hannah throws a bottle
at Laurie.]
Laurie: “Ow! Why’d you do that?”
Liam: “Because it was funny!”
Ruth: “Woolfire was amazing. Ask Amber, she’ll tell you…
AMBER! HOW WAS WOOLFIRE?”
Amber: [without enthusiasm] “… was all right…”
[the
train’s announcement bell rings]
Becca: “Would Laurie Glenn stop playing with the train
doors…”
Laurie: “Who knows what woggle-swaps are?”
Ruth & Becca: “It’s where you swap your woggles!”
Amber: “It looks like he’s fallen into a clothes dying
vat.”
Ros: “As you do.”
[Anna is by a statue of a
granny, posing for a photo.]
Ros: “Don’t lean on her, you should be helping her!”
Anna: “I can’t help her; she’s got a leek in her bag!”
Ruth: “I woke up and you’d kicked me off and it was
[indecipherable
announcement ending in seven-B]
Ros: “What? That makes no sense; they made the whole
announcement in German, apart from the time, which was in English! Just… what?!”
[upon
exiting the kitchen]
Hannah: “Oh, they’ve got an oven, and a microwave!”
Rosalie: “Have they got pudding?”
Ruth: “We’re in a whole load of people who don’t drink, so
we can just get battered, and everyone else can look at us in disgust!”
Ros: “I keep thinking I should do a Masters… somewhere
foreign.”
Joe: “I don’t know how to draw Saturday!”
IDA
ISABELLA
GRAHN
HASS
#1
Pooka: “Ida, I saw your tattoo. I like it.”
Isabella: ”Thanks. I like it, too.”
Rosalie: “You were bein’ FLIRTED with!”
Pooka: “Really? I didn’t realise.”
Rosalie: “But you were FLIRTING too!”
Pooka: “Oh, I knew I was flirting.”
Laurie: “I’ve got a pens as well.”
Ruth: “Oh, you gee…” *drinks*
Isabella: “I’ve enjoyed the games… and the amount of nudity.”
Laurie: “I’ll be back soon; I’m just going to shake Henry
out.”
Ruth: “Over the summer, I’ve turned into the sort of
person that has a pen with them all of the time.”
Laurie: “Always needing to write down boys’ numbers?”
Ruth: “Constantly.”
[Amber is sitting having
a cigarette and a cup of tea, looking blissed out.]
Ruth: “You look really happy.”
Amber: “Yeah! Now all I need is some sex.”
Anna: “Are we playing the picture drawing drawing game?”
Pooka: “Picture drawing drawing game?”
Laurie: “Peanut butter jelly time!...”
[Ros is playing with her
hair.]
Ruth: “She’s titillating herself.”
Ruth: “People were walking past, giggling. There was this
flowery tent… emitting Harry Potter.”
Lucie: “We’re going to go and spend the day in Århus, with lots
of alcohol and euphoria drugs!”
Ruth: “Pooka, your ears are wobbling.”
[dreadful
cacophony of banging metal]
Annoying
Voice of Doom: “BREAKFAST!”
Ruth: “Ros, what star sign are you?”
Ros: “Cancer.”
[Ruth squints at the
magazine. It’s in German.]
Ros: “Does anyone want some Dan cake?”
Ros: “How many of us are there? There’s
five of us, right?”
Ruth: “Yeah, Liam doesn’t count.”
Ros: “Liam’s not real?”
Ruth: “He’s just a figment of Jessie Fleming’s
imagination.”
Ruth: “I call him ginger a lot.”
Laurie: “Why?”
Ruth: “Because he is.”
Dannie: “Ida was the first to get naked. It was, like, one
second and all her clothes were off.”
Pooka: “So, where are we going?”
Ros: “Eurostar!”
BLACK CAT CONDOMS?!
Ros: “I want to be at DF Kamp now!”
Pooka: “…fine, for those you that are going to DF
Kamp…”
Ros: “I’m going to be really sad and check my tickets,
and put them somewhere safe, with my passport. Not like we’ve been through lots
of countries today, or anything.”
[2 seconds later…]
Ros: “Oh, that was lucky. I
thought I’d lost it… but it was just in the wrong paperclip.”
(Unsurprisingly,
MS Word suggested “oh that” or “oh, which” for the beginning of the sentence.)
Amber: “If anything goes wrong, we’ll meet by the horse
dressed as a zebra drinking tea!”
Ruth: “I put my card in, and it was, like, ‘hello, do
you want some money?’ Yes, please. ‘Tough. Please remove your
card.’ Bugger.”
Liam: “See you on the other side.”
Ruth: “It’s a fun game. It’s called, ‘bored men with
shitty jobs will do anything for you if you have the tits’.”
Ruth: “I wanted to have ice cream for breakfast, but apparently
that was immature and childish.”
Ros: “I don’t speak Belgian. Do you speak Belgian?”
[Ruth goes through a
scanner at Customs, and it bleeps loudly.]
Pooka: “Bleeping marvellous.”
Laurie: “I might have to sit next to Anna Donne – the
Anna Donne – voted World’s Sexiest Female!”
Ruth: “We’d better get onto the Eurostar, and finish
preparing the sex game.”
Pooka: “I need someone to sit next to me, and kick me, and
say things like, ‘Pooka, if you are ordering food in
Ruth: *reading ‘Harry Potter’* “Oh, no! That is
a bit of a shame!”
Laurie: “Shut up!”
Pooka: “This bridge is closed, and
to cross, you must pay me a toll, answer me a riddle, or defeat me in combat.”
Pooka: “The ear’s an erogenous zone, apparently.”
Ruth: “Yes. I have ears.”
Pooka & Amber: “I’ve eaten so much, I feel so fat, and now I’m
stuck in a box with water and rats! And rats and water, and water and rats!”
Everyone: “Breasts, vagina, cock and bum, cock and bum! /
Breasts, vagina, cock and bum, cock and bum! / And nipples, and fingers, and
ears, and tongue… / Breasts, vagina, cock and bum! Cock and bum.”
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